God, Show Yourself!

I was watching a movie a number of years ago – honestly I don’t remember the name of the movie or what it was about – in fact, it may not have even been a movie, but rather a TV show.  It really doesn’t matter.  What matters is what stood out to me about one of the characters in the story.  The character was not at all a good person, and he blamed his personality flaws on God – or rather the absence of God.  He proclaimed that as a child he prayed earnestly that, if God were real, that he would physically reveal himself.  Since God never answered that prayer, he concluded there was no God – and the rest of his life, his character development, etc. flowed from that world view.

God, show yourself.   Isn’t that what we all really want?  After all, wouldn’t it just be better somehow if the heavens would open up and God would simply reveal himself to all of creation?  Perhaps he could write his name across the horizon with the clouds like a skywriter or something?  Or if not that, wouldn’t it be good if an angel were to appear to us and tell us what God wanted from us – or at the very least to confirm that he is real, that he exists, and that we are doing right by following him?  It just seems like that would solve so many problems.  If God just revealed himself, then surely the world would fall into line.  OK, truth time.  If we were all being honest with ourselves, I imagine we would have to admit that we have all had such thoughts from time to time and may have even specifically prayed that God would show himself the way the character in the movie did.  It's OK, this is a safe place.  We can admit it - so long as we are willing to hear the other side of the story.  

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STORY

Unfortunately, that kind of thinking just doesn’t quite cut the mustard, so to speak. Putting aside the fact that placing demands and ultimatums on the creator of the universe is itself a pretty risky proposition, wishing for God to reveal himself in that manner is a lot like how the Pharisees responded to Jesus.   They demanded that Jesus show some kind of "sign" of his authority.  Ironically, Jesus actually did show the Pharisees many signs – miracles, healings, acts of power, etc.  Since apparently these were not good enough to convince them that he was who he claimed to be, Jesus responded with “An evil and adulterous generation seeks for a sign, but no sign will be given to it except the sign of the prophet Jonah.” (Matt 12:39) Ouch, did Jesus just call us evil and adulterous?  Actually, yes.  It applies to us when we demand that God reveal himself to us.  

Demanding such a sign actually reveals a pretty dangerous lack of faith on our part.  Many of us may be familiar with the words of Hebrews 11:6 that says “without faith it is impossible to please [God]…”  From that verse, we know how important faith is.  However, we cannot ignore the second half of that verse: “…for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.”  When we demand that God prove his existence, we are admitting that we do not believe in his existence – and that places us dangerously close to the edge of blasphemy or apostasy.

On the other hand, having doubts is a very natural, human response to the brokenness of the world around us.  So how do we deal with those doubts without wading into deep and treacherous waters of unbelief?

Rather than demand a sign from God, our prayers ought to be like those of Moses when he prayed “Please show me Your Glory” (Exodus 33:18).  If you were at church this past Sunday (sermon here), you would know that all of us have access to the revealed glory of God through the person of Jesus Christ, so praying those exact words are not necessary. Although they won’t hurt, they are simply not necessary. To see God’s glory, all we have to do is open up the gospels and see the life of God’s only begotten son, Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ was the perfect reflection of God’s character and Glory (John 1:14; Col 1:15,19; Heb 1:3).  However, it is not the specific prayer but rather the sentiment behind Moses’ prayer that is instructive to help us without our doubts.  Moses’ desire was FOR God.  Moses wanted to know God better.  He wanted to experience his presence.  He wanted a close encounter with God.  He didn't question God's existence, but rather asked to be closer to him.

What we can learn from Moses, therefore, is that when we are struggling with our faith, rather than pray for signs and proofs, we should pray that God would give us a greater desire for him.  The more we desire the presence of God, the more we will encounter God personally, and the more he actually will be revealed to us in a real, present, and personal way.  It is actually a far more powerful experience when God reveals himself in that manner than if he simply opened up the skies and wrote his name across the horizon with the clouds.  There is nothing that will strengthen your faith more than when God draws near to you – and this happens best when we seek God.  This is what the author of Hebrews means when he says “he rewards those who seek him.”  Jesus’ own brother, James, said it this way in James 4:8, “Draw near to God and he will draw near to you.”

Here's what may surprise you... God is searching out for those who are seeking him.  The Bible says in Psalm 14:2 that "The Lord looks down from heaven on the children of man, to see if there are any who understand, who seek after God."  And when he finds us desiring him and seeking after him, as it says in Hebrews 11:6, he rewards us - with his presence.

Besides that, when God does open up the heavens and reveal himself to the world, it will be a great and terrible day.  On that day, it will be too late for those who do not already believe. When he comes, it will be with power and authority to reward the just and to judge the world – yet another reason not to pray that prayer unless you are absolutely sure of your standing with God.

So the next time you find yourself doubting – and we all do – pray this prayer instead:  “God, forgive my doubts, I know your grace is sufficient even in my failures.  Grant me a greater desire for you.  Draw near to me so that I may encounter your presence.”   You might be surprised at the result, but you will never be disappointed.

My Greatest Struggle

This past Sunday we talked about how Jacob struggled with God (Sermon Link) .  Jacob and I are kindred spirits in many ways, I think.  Over the course of many years, I have had a number of personal and spiritual struggles myself – as I am sure most of you have as well.  These struggles have ranged from extreme selfishness to excessive materialism to uncontrolled anger – all of which are sins in their own right.  However, most of these struggles were not so much about those specific sins, but rather have been the result of even greater unrepentant sin in my life that persisted over a course of years – even decades.  Often I would plead with God about these sins and would wonder why I could never overcome them, but all the while, I was blind – or was turning a blind eye – to the greater sin.  Of course I realize that sin is sin and that ultimately there is no one sin that is greater than any other sin.  However, the persistent sin in my life was indeed greater - not because it was somehow worse in God’s eyes, but because it was the sin of rebellion concerning God’s call on my life.  The other sins were struggles that I truly desired to be rid of from my life, but this was one I intentionally held on to for myself – God could not have it. 

Growing up, I was eager for all things God and was very zealous for spiritual things.  But even in that zeal, there were seeds of fear and greed in my heart.  Therefore, when God called me into ministry in my Jr/Sr years of high school, I made a conscious choice – out of a combination of both fear and greed – to say no.  I chose instead to go to college to become an engineer and make “good” money.  That disobedience changed me.  People who knew me in the early-mid 80s would not recognize the person that I became in the 90s.

Much like how Jacob wrestled with God because he wanted to have God on his own terms, I wanted to have God on my own terms – being obedient in some things, while ignoring his overall purpose for my life.  Jacob’s “fight” with God ended when God touched his thigh.   My fight with God ended when it became clear that my disobedience would not just cost me all of these other struggles, but would cost me my very marriage. Indeed, if God had not touched my thigh at that time (so to speak), Patty and I would not be married today.

Since that time, God has done an amazing work in my life.  With rare setbacks, I think God has dealt with my selfishness.  Certainly he has dealt with my materialistic desires.  He certainly has dealt with my uncontrolled anger.  People who only knew me in the 90s would not recognize the person that I have become through God’s grace and mercy – and people who did not know me in the 90s simply can’t fathom the change that God has made in my life.  There have been some interesting conversations that have included a combination of old and new friends!  

God has certainly dealt with almost all of those struggles in my life and has given me the victory over them – almost being the key word.  Obviously, we are never sin free, so I still have occasional setbacks.  However, there is still one big struggle that I have not yet conquered.  WARNING: If you don’t think it is advisable for a pastor to reveal his spiritual weaknesses and openly confess sin, then I recommend you stop reading here.   I realize that in times past it may have been a no-no in American Christian Culture for a pastor to admit his weaknesses.  Pastors are to be held in high esteem and should be above such failings.  So why do I tell you this? I tell you this because I don’t want to be a hypocrite; I would be no better than a Pharisee if I was not openly repentant and admit this freely and publicly.  Therefore, while I know and realize a pastor is supposed to have it all together, I know a greater truth is at work here - that there is freedom in confession.  I do not do this to make a show or to whine or to bring attention upon myself.  I do this because I know with all my heart that many of you who will read this are also struggling with sin in your life.  You feel alone.  You are afraid to talk about it.  And so maybe, just maybe, by speaking truth regarding the sin in my own life, you can be encouraged to stay faithful and keep fighting on. (whew – that was difficult – the problem is that the next is even more difficult).

There are always long-lasting consequences to long-standing sin.  My previously mentioned disobedience resulted in both financial and relational consequences.   I destroyed a number of relationships at work and in other places.  While I have attempted to make amends, some of those people will never see me as anything other than who I was then.   I am not surprised these consequences persist, even though the source of the problem has essentially been dealt with.  In Christ there is forgiveness of sin, but the consequences can last a lifetime.

Unfortunately, one of those long-lasting consequences is physical in nature and that is how I introduce my greatest struggle.  One of the sins that manifested itself in my life during that time was the sin of gluttony.  Since I was so unhappy, I often used food as a source of comfort – and my weight spiraled out of control as a result.

Gluttony is as much a sin as lying, cheating, or even murder; but in Christian circles it is often the unspoken and acceptable sin.  I have long since accepted that such a mentality is wrong and I dealt with that in my life and even wrote about it in this blog post (The Acceptable Sin).

Unfortunately, 38 months later I have made no headway on this struggle in my life.  In fact, I may be worse off now than I was even then.  This struggle is one for which I have simply been unable to achieve victory.  I certainly know how to fix it (as indicated in the blog), but the problem has been in the execution.  I have given this over to God so many times that it seems almost disingenuous now.  However, I can’t allow that to stop me from trying again and again.  I have genuinely repented of this sin more times than I can even count.

As a Pastor, I am supposed to know the answers to problems like this.  In fact, I actually do know the answer.  Live by the spirit (Romans 8), not by the flesh (Romans 7).  It is as simple as “surrender to God” – stop fighting with him and let him touch your thigh… Except that I am not fighting God on this.  I agree with him.  My struggle is not with God, but with my own flesh.

This is where the ocean of God’s grace is at its deepest.  I am still a man.  I am still a sinner.  God is not done with me.  His grace is sufficient – not only to forgive me again and again, but also to carry me through my own struggle.  God’s forgiveness for His redeemed is unlimited.  I know that greater is he that is in me than he that is in the world.   I know that victory is available through the power of the Holy Spirit.  I know that I can move from a Romans 7 paradigm to a Romans 8 paradigm (if you don’t know what that means, go read the two chapters all in one setting).  And most importantly, I know that eventually I will see victory over even this struggle in my life.

Yes, I am weak, but I also know that Jesus has said “my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor 12:9).  For this reason, I resolve that I am fully dependent upon God: dependent upon him for forgiveness, dependent upon him to use me for his purposes even in the midst of my flaws, and dependent upon him for the ultimate victory.   Paul was given such a weakness and he prayed three times for it to be removed.  I have prayed many, many times more.  Still, the struggle remains.  However, unlike in times past where I simply chose to ignore the reasons why I could not overcome my previous struggles, I have yet to determine the cause for this one.  Perhaps, like Paul, it is to keep me humble.  Honestly, I don’t know – so long as it is not something I am wrestling WITH God about.  So even now as I write this, I am recommitting myself (again) to the idea of dealing with “passive gluttony” that I discussed in that blog post.

My point is this:  no matter what it is that you are struggling with, please know that you are not alone.  God still loves you more than you could ever imagine.  God’s grace is more than sufficient to cover over whatever struggle you may have.  And victory is within reach – even if it doesn’t seem that way right now.

You have been encouraged this week through the sermon to truly encounter God as Jacob did and so overcome the struggles in your life.  You need to know I am right there with you.  I want you to put your faith in Jesus that he can help you overcome every struggle in your life as I do myself every day.  I believe he can even as I still struggle in my own life. 

Besides, wouldn’t you rather have a pastor who knows that he needs to be fully dependent upon God?  It is that dependence that will keep us all on the straight and narrow.

Missing The Mark

It is one of those strange things that probably every pastor knows about, but probably few really talk about – and heaven forbid any of us should admit it in a blog like I am about to do. 

As a pastor, some days you deliver the word that you believe God has given you and everything goes smooth – the delivery, the response from the congregation, and even the perceived movement of the Holy Spirit in the service.  Those are very encouraging days.  Other days, however, you do the exact same thing and can’t help but feel like absolutely nothing happened.  No response.  No movement of the Spirit.  It all just falls flat – or so it seems.   It is days like that which can really discourage a pastor and make him feel like a failure.   Sunday night was one of those days for me.

I do not say that to try to garner sympathy or to manipulate you into saying something encouraging to me or to try to convince me I am wrong.  That is really not the point.  The reason I say it because I believe so strongly in the importance of real, effective, discipleship in the church that I believe every single believer should be actively engaged in it.   After spending the entire summer talking about what is important in the church – Loving God, Loving Others, Bible Teaching, Prayer, Fellowship, and the Lord’s Supper – and then spending the last four week really digging into the essentials of discipleship – Spiritual Disciplines, mentoring, and Jesus’ model of discipleship – I really believed we would all be on board with changing the way we do discipleship  -  especially since the method I presented Sunday night is so absolutely simple that anyone can do it.

Maybe I misread the response, but after all of that, it sure seemed to me last night that (with perhaps a few exceptions) not everyone is necessarily on the same page as I am right now when it comes to discipleship.  Maybe everyone is still soaking it all in.  Maybe everyone is just slow to respond. 

Maybe everyone is afraid to try something new.  Or maybe my own “fears” are right and everyone is not yet on board with the idea at all.  Regardless, I can’t help but think right now that somehow I just missed the mark.

For decades now we (the generic we, not specifically our church) have gone about church the same old way – except that (at the risk of overgeneralizing) we are beginning to fall away even from that way.  In years past, the model was Sunday School, Sunday morning worship, Sunday afternoon training union, Sunday evening worship, and Wednesday night prayer meetings.  We were dedicated and committed to being there every time the doors open.   Over time, we have become less committed to that.  These days, you are considered committed if you attend Sunday morning worship three times a month, much less three times a week.  Fewer and fewer of us are coming to Sunday School and, even if we do, we are not (again at the risk of overgeneralizing) really using Sunday School to truly disciple believers so that they know how to be true followers of Jesus Christ.  Fewer still come to prayer meeting on Wednesday night and training union is all but non-existent. 

The bottom line is this. Three marks have been missed.  

First, the church at large that has really missed the mark when it comes to making disciples of Jesus Christ.  Our children are growing up and leaving the church.  More and more Christians are becoming less and less committed to the cause of Christ.  And society is suffering as a result.  The church has begun to lose our saltiness. 

Second, I think perhaps I may have personally missed the mark over the last few weeks making my point about the critical need for discipleship and how something MUST change in how we go about discipleship.  What the church in America been doing for the last 100 years simply is not working.  We have to go back to the drawing board.  Fortunately, we don’t have to reinvent the wheel.  We just have to fall back on how Jesus himself did discipleship.  His method works and we have 2000+ years of testimony to prove that it does.

Finally, I really think I missed the mark Sunday night in explaining the D-Life process.  I don’t think we came away from our time with as good a feel for the process as I had hoped.  The thing is, the D-Life process is so simple anyone can do it.  Read a chapter a day.  Get together and discuss some simple questions about one of the passages.  Pray together.  Fellowship.  Perhaps do a ministry project together every couple of months.  It is really quite simple.  The real work - if indeed it is work at all - is on the part of the spiritually mature members of the group to be available and mentors to the less mature believers in the group.   Since I may have done such a poor job, maybe more information about D-Life would be helpful, so how about a link to another article by the creator of the D-Life process.  Try here: http://livingthedlife.com/discipleship-by-storytelling-and-group-discussion/

I hope that I am wrong.  I hope that everyone just needs some time to let it all soak in.  The last thing I ever want to do is “guilt” anyone into doing anything you have not bought into yourself.  Discipleship is a commitment and that commitment must come as a result of one’s own internal desire to grow closer to God.  It must be something you WANT to do otherwise, it will never work.  Otherwise, it will just be another “program” that dies from lack of interest.  Yes, it is cliche, but discipleship cannot be a program.  It must be a lifestyle.  It must be because we find it so important that we devote our lives to it - which is really what the Great Commission is all about.

Therefore, if or when you are ready to take your relationship with God to the next level, we want to be ready to help make that possible.  So… WHEN you are ready, CLICK HERE to sign up and we will get you plugged into a discipleship group right away.

I love you all.  Forgive me for venting a bit.  I believe in this… and I hope you will come to that point as well soon.